At this point Inna, So many things had happen and I will be leaving Cagayan de Oro to catch my dream. I will start in Cebu City. You see I was very busy the past few months with the Bar and Restaurant that I opened in 1997 with 2 other friends and business partners, Tito Tom and Tito Rupert. I'm sure you can recall the time when I brought you to ECO POINT and taught your first computer game. That was the time you saw the "mouse" right? I bet you enjoyed your first game too. Well that place has to be closed because business is not doing well. In addition, I just had an early retirement from 13 years with a British pharmaceutical company. I can't go on working for someone else until I grow old and retire a sickly person. This means that our trips to Bukidnon won't be possible anymore. But I assure you that one day, I will be taking you again to places I love very much. I don't know when, perhaps next month, next year or maybe a long long time from now. Maybe when you have kids of your own. Well, it doesn't really matter because I know we will always enjoy. Only time will regret! Also, I will be taking a major leap in changing my career path. I can't continue working with the doctors in choosing the right medicine for the sick patients as a sales person. I know, I will still be helping people specially friends in the future. I’ll be looking forward to the day when both of us will join efforts to help the needy. 
 
(The next entries were written after 4 years)  
 
Good day my young lady. Today you are 12 years old. Time flies so fast- Its been a long time now since I left our hometown. So many things had happen. My stay in the Queen City of the South is very colorful and its still is up to this time. I arrived in December of 1999 with nothing in my pocket but a heart full of hope that carries my dreams and a healthy mind full of experience and raw creativity. Back in our hometown, three years earlier, Mama Sweet and me met two exciting couple who introduced me to MLM (Multi Level Marketing) otherwise commonly misinterpreted as networking. Yes, I had so much faith in this system and I still have even to my last breath. The two couples are Mario & Baby Tero and to date had I not stop building my network marketing, I could have fully enjoyed the fruits of our labor. I continued my Multi Level Marketing with Amway’s Network 21 until 2002 and stoped actively building the business because I no longer have extra time to spare for evening meetings and seminars. There were required trips to Manila and I just could not afford to spend my savings anymore. In addition, we realized that MLM does not easily work with Filipinos because we want to short-cut things. This is where a proven and successful system must be applied yet, most wanted to do things on their own- the Filipino way. It amazes me so much that so many of us wanted to change our destiny but would not want to work hard, we want to have lots of money but don’t want to give up the unnecessary things in life. So I stopped. As for you, I suggest you give this a try maybe it will work. Just be careful not to give-up anything in the pursuit of a working MLM.
From there, I had the opportunity to be employed again for a Filipino-Chinese businessman whose business in selling Yamaha motorcycles have reached to all the corners of the country. But my work is far from selling these motorbikes. I was tasked to promote & sell a 1-year-old computer program called ALCHEMY. Whew! That was the most boring thing I have ever done yet I learned a lot in constructing a database. Unfortunate the business lasted for only 3 years then folded up.
By God’s grace, an American boss who worked for a group of entrepreneurs that started the only “As-seen-on-TV” home shopping network immediately hired me. That was the first time I have to make overseas calls, send fax, reply emails from sunrise to sunset. Imagine this: my customers are all over Asia including India, Nepal, Australia, & New Zealand. My superiors including the American are a South African, a British, and a Kiwi (New Zealander). I often tell my friends that I work in a United Nations office. But I did not lasted any longer than 6 months because of the work pressure and I need to relate to real humans not just voices from the distant corners of the globe. 
So I ended up in Real Estate and Property Development Company that is the biggest in the country and has required me to sell commercial and residential lots, condominiums and club shares as a Property Specialist. So my forte is in sales & marketing. As a personal preference, Training is where I am looking at. Mentoring is more fulfilling than any material achievement. Its sharing and giving life to another person. I remember a Buddhist Proverb: When the student is ready, a teacher will appear. No matter how many times one seeks to learn, if his attitude and mind is not open to accept that he knows nothing, he won’t learn.
 
As for you, I remember during your preschool as a nursery student, that you wanted to be a scientist or a doctor of medicine. You even asked for a microscope and I gave you instead a magnifying lens together with the toys for young scientist, which really fitted with your very inquisitive mind.
 
INNA NOTES 5:

June 19, 2005: FATHER’S DAY. I really do not feel so alone now unlike the past years. You see, I have neighbors my age and they have no kids of their own yet and to them this day is not so significant. But for sure, they have fathers too. Maybe they are not sensitive about the elderly and getting old. The pain of missing you is intense when I see daughters your age and that’s the reason why I avoid going to malls on weekends and holidays. Yet, I feel blessed to have you remember me always. Maybe not everyday but for sure every time you did something that is not right, correct? Well, at least I hope you can recall the lessons I kept repeating. The important thing is to be honest to Mama and Papa and not to do the same mistake again. I’m just staying home today and will hear mass latter n the afternoon. I remember my grade school Jesuit teacher Fr. Deighler who said that the best way to spend Sunday is to hear mass early in the morning bec that is putting God first before enjoying the rest of the day. How would you feel if your friends only remember inviting you after the party? Your guess is as good as mine- It hurts to be left unremembered. I believe your Mama goes to church on Saturday’s right? Well, as long as it’s a 5:30pm mass then its called “anticipated mass” meaning the readings and the gospel is the same as the next day and ideal for the busy people. Let me share to you some facts about today:

 

The first father’s day was observed in Spokane, Washington, in 1910. Sonora Louise Smart Dodd, of Washington, first proposed the idea of a “Father’s day” in 1909 to honor her father William Smart. It was untill 1966 that American President Lyndon Johnson signed a proclamation declaring the 3rd Sunday of June as our day.

 

Isn’t that great? Fathers are like mothers too huh both have a special day every year! Fathers know best too. We delve deeper and can be as sensitive and caring as your grandma. So how about daughters & sons? Maybe that’s a great idea too. I wonder if somebody has thought of this, if none yet, you’ll have the chance to start this and hopefully be recognized in the whole world. The next time we’ll spend father’s day together we’ll have a very very tight hug, clean the car or bicycle together (if we have one), take the dog to walk, run errands for me (ha ha ha!) massage my head, watch movie, have a fine dinner, give Papa a simple gift (this is not necessary), and so many things we can do.  Oh, remember that your Auntie Tata owns a 3-year old black Labrador called Tisha? She’s due to have puppies now so next year we’ll have a 1-year old  Labrador too! Isn’t this going to be exciting? As for the name, we’ll decide when Auntie gives you

 

Cheers to all fathers & daughters!

 

Last February 27,1999 we went to Xavier your school and watched your dance presentation. I was so glad and very very happy to see how you actively participated and took pictures. I was the proudest Papa and lost count of how many pictures I took and consumed all of it. As I watched you with your classmates, I can see that you will grow up to be a beautiful and charming lady just like your Mama Sweet. Of all the Titas you've had, she is the most beautiful and a very charming too. Your Kuya Howell must be lucky to have a mother like that. His father just did not stay with them anymore because of the very big difference in attitude with his Mama. Just like your Papa. You know very well that Mama and I don't agree on a lot of things. You see, Mama has a very strong character and a very good provider (and a very good cook right?). That is why she is a very independent person. She can stand on her own and even have the heart to help other people specially her friends. I sure will hope and pray that you will be able to have these qualities because this is where I am not strong. But this does not mean I don't love you and your mom. Nobody can replace my love for you and I will give my life just to protect you. Just remember to keep on loving!

Your Manang told me that you don't want to practice writing your name and prefer to read books. Well, this is just OK for me because I love reading books too. They bring you to places you’ve never been and it makes you feel like your traveling or talking to the characters. You'll be turning 6 years old on your birthday and by that that you'll probably be learning how to write. Writing is a very good talent. When you write very good stories and have them published, you can earn a hefty amount of money. Inna will be a very catchy name for an author or novelist. Just be sensitive to what you really wanted to be as you grow so that you can start early and this will be an advantage. Even if you want to be an athlete like a swimmer or a Tennis player, learning the game early and joining competitions will mold you to be one of the best. Just do the things you want by heart and no one can beat you. Like your Papa, in everything he does, he do it with his heart and he never regrets. You see, if one is sincere to his intentions, he gets things done at the right time and place with the right people. No matter where your heart will take you don't be afraid. Reach for the brightest star but never forget to thank God the Creator who allows all good things to happen.

I just came home from Puntod after visiting Lola Flor, I do this every Sunday and if you remember, we used to do this before we go to Lim Ket Kai mall or Save-a-Lot. Lola always looks for you because she doesn't see you more often. Lola is getting very old and she feels sick more often that is why I need to visit her from time to time. Kuya JR and Nonoy have just bought an aquarium with lots of tropical fish in it. In fact, there were about three that just hatched its eggs and these has become tiny school of fish. I guess Lola just wanted to have lots of companion at home like dogs and cats. Remember the puppy I bought when we went to the beach with my friends?

It is now big and we call him Bernard. How I wish that you can have a cat or dog for a pet because they can watch over us aside from taking care of them. But you can get Asthma or cough from its furs. That is why it is good for you to take some form of sports to exercise and strengthen your lungs. Having a healthy body makes us enjoy a lot of things like food and pets. I droped-by at Tito Adongs place tonight and had a short talk or shall we say chat. Men do indulge in conversations too like women. We do this more often especially when I feel bad or my mood seemed to be down. Tito Adong is very good friend. We have been hanging around since we were kids and we still enjoy talking about anything even with just a few sticks of cigarettes. He is a self confessed Philosopher, Psychologist, Anthropologist, Mountaineer, Composer, and many more. In other words an Artist. We learn a lot from each other especially about life and existence. He knows a lot of things that I hide from everybody. We do have some dark spots that don't show to everybody and there are very few people who see these and Tito Adong is one. When the time comes that you want to know all my secrets, he is one person you can go.

Now that you have grown older I hope that you have made bonds to your other cousins who are like you, a lady also. Connie and Camil will grow up and follow you if you have become a loving and caring Ate Inna. See how big your family is, even if Papa is not always around he constantly pray and thinks about you always. I want you to know that Mama Sweet has a very special “yaya” whom she calls mama like you. Lola Baby took care of her when she was a child and she loved her for that. Mama Sweet always has Lola Baby at her side even through rough times as well as the good. You can also tell Mama Sweet anything you want because she will always listen and give you good advise if you want. I am always amazed by her though she does not talk a lot. There is wisdom in her silence and power in her humility. I’m sure you need these qualities too aside from the things that Mama Chay has taught you. I know that you have become strong in character like her and sensitive like me.

I hope you can remember that Papa loves nature specially climbing mountains and playing tennis. Before you were born Papa would ride his mountain bike with his friends and go up to the mountains and go to places where no one has ever been. These are times when you get very close to nature and even talk to the trees, birds, rivers and mountains. This is the place where your thoughts are very clear and you experience a kind of well-being. In other words, being close to God and the living things. This is what I do when I have problems or things to think very deeply. I look up to the sky and stars at night. I look for the sight of the mountain and trees because they clear my mind from the hustles and bustles of daily activities. I also go to church to pray and tell Jesus about my wrong doings and ask his forgiveness just like the way we ask for apology to Mama, Lolo an Lola.

Oh, Lolo Bob has taught me the art of fishing. He learned this long before he was a kid in the province of Compostela, Cebu. When he went home from the US, he brought along all of his fishing gears and gave some of it to me. We would travel from Cagayan to Gingoog to fish. That's how he taught me to be patient too. Fishing will teach you not to hurry things up. We would wait for hours until the fish catches our bait. So patience is always a virtue even with friends, right? I hope you have understood now what I have always told you- To be patient! I know that your are a very intelligent and sensitive woman that's why you want things to be done your way and immediately. Remember I used to call you Miss Complainer? Ha ha ha! That was because you did not have the patience for your cousins Connie and Niko as playmates. You were very young then and I understand.

Five (5) years had passed since I last wrote an entry to this journal. Blogs never existed before, and thanks to the techno geek who started this, I no longer have to worry about web designs, web page, web host, ISPs and many more. I have created this blog for you and the world around us. I DON’T EXACTLY KNOW WHEN WILL YOU BE ABLE TO READ THIS. You are entering your 6th grade this June 2005 and Internet is all around. I just hope and pray that you will enjoy reading this. This is for you my Inna girl:

I’ve been waiting for the right time to write you this and as far as I can remember. I’ve wanted to do this since you were born. I started this journal when you were 9 years old and that was the time we parted ways: You were with your mama and I am alone.

I’m sure that there were a lot of times that you asked yourself why some bad things happen to people. Well my baby, the rain pours on the good and the bad. We experience some bad things in our life and others call it misfortunes but for me it is a learning experience. We learn to continue what is good and avoid if not stop the bad. There are also times that the people we love and care for hurt us, I’m sure they have a reason for doing it. If we understand these things then we have grown or to be frank about it, we have matured. Right now I’m 35 years old and I have thought about writing you this 3 years ago. See, it’s a little difficult for me to make up my mind, even at this age we still have to keep on growing and learning. Maybe that is one of the things your Mama and I disagree. You see, we are both very independent in our way of thinking that we often don’t agree to a lot of things. You will understand this as you grow my little girl.

I can vividly recall the day you were born, it was 15 minutes before midnight of August 26,1993 when Dr. Leo Notario received you. I was so exited to know of your condition irregardless weather you be a boy or girl but honestly we wanted a girl so that your Mama will a have an angel by her side to love, grow and care for . God has given us a very special gift and that is you. You were perfectly born a healthy and cuddly baby. Mama did not immediately see you come out from her womb because she got so exhausted from 12 hours of labor and was put to sleep. I did not have any sleep at all from watching both of you. We went home to our little house to get a good rest but our friends and cousins came to visit and look at you. You look very much like me when I was a baby. Who would imagine a little cute helpless little one has now grown to be a fine lady. From the start your Lolo Bob has always been there for you and Mama. Infact he was the only one for 1 year who keeps asking your mama if she is already pregnant. He really wanted us to have you because he wanted a little girl for a grandchild. He just did not know how much we tried for one year to have you in this world. Lola Red saw you only in pictures because she is very far away from us. She works in the US where Lolo also worked for a long time. Also, your cousin Howell has been playing with you since you were born and Mama Sweet, she is always there for us. The sweetest lady that has ever came into our life. Nobody taught you to call her Mama, I guess it was just your instinct that told you because she is also a wonderful mother to Howell. I hope and pray that you will love her as much as you love your real mother.

We use to live at Lola Flor’s house and that is where your other cousins play with you. There is JR, Nonoy, Andy and Miko who are your Kuyas because they are all boys. I watched you play with them and wanted so much to be just like one of them but a beautiful lady is always better for you because they will take care of you and guard you from the dangers of growing and living.